PERMISSION and approval starts at a young age. I can remember I had to ask my mother permission for anything I wanted or wanted to do. Mother may I go out doors, Mother may I have a snack, Mother may I watch TV and so on. At that age we needed to ask permission from someone else so we could do things and not get into trouble. As we grow the permission stops and we forget that we need to get permission from ourselves as we go through life.
Hard concept for me to give permission to be good to myself, permission to love myself. When Mark talked about permission a light bulb that went off in my head. Permission to be successful and permission to be the ideal weight for myself..
I have always had a hard time with my weight all my life I used food as comfort in the year 1980 when I was at my ideal weight, I was very competitive did competitive trail riding and endurance riding, anyone who has horses would know what that is, I was in good shape and happy with myself. Then a comment came along from my x-husband, you are a slut, you are no good, who do you think you are. Even today I remember those haunting words because I went to my brothers wedding looking exceptional and I knew it, I had worded hard then to be knocked down and crushed.
Ever since then my weight ballooned up to 320 pounds, after the divorce I did loose some and then yo-yoed back and forth between 250 and 290 pounds never getting back to my ideal weight of 160 pounds.
Finally I gave myself permission on January 1, 2014 not really a New Years resolution because I don’t make those but permission to be my ideal weight again and (not to lose) but to release the pounds from my body and to become a healthier me. It is my time!!!!!!!!!! ME to do this for ME!!!!! I know not very good English but I don’t care their is no judgment on myself anymore I don’t need my Moms permission, even thought she puts in her two cents worth, I only need to give myself the permission. What a release, I am proud to say I have given up wheat, have not had any cravings for sugar anymore, and steadily releasing the pounds to a ideal weight for me and a healthier me. See, it is all about me and giving myself permission.